Keeping it real with MJ

Did you know that Michael Jackson passed away? Well, in case you have been living under a rock, he did. And the last few days have been chock full of tributes and articles. The entire line up for the BET awards changed. And I can no longer stand to listen to radio. I mean, how many times can I hear "I'll Be There" before I want to poke my eardrums with a hanger. I have given up on Facebook for a while, as my friends are no longer posting updates on their lives, but tributes to MJ.

I am having a really hard time comprehending the outpouring of "love" from people who, quite frankly, were cracking jokes about the man in the weeks, months and years before his death. It seems so hypocritical to elevate someone after death and to forget that the man faced charges of child molestation TWICE. Ask any one person who participated in the tribute circus if they can recall the name of MJ's last album. Or when was the last time they went to an MJ concert. Did they show support for him during his 1993 or 2003 trial?

Look, I had the red jacket with the zippers from the Beat It video. I even bought a pair of silver glitter socks after Billy Jean. I remember flipping out when he did the moonwalk at the Grammy's. For my elementary school graduation, I asked my parents to buy me a record player and the Thriller album. I remember it being one of the best gifts I ever received. I even still have the VHS tape of the Making of Michael Jackson's Thriller, directed by Jon Landis. I WAS a fan. However, after the first trial, and more importantly after the "Living with Michael Jackson" documentary, he no longer held any sway with me. And I was able to see through the singing and dancing and flair. What I saw was a sad and disturbed man who had completely lost touch with reality. And I mean COMPLETELY. For a 40 year old man to think it is perfectly acceptable and appropriate to sleep in the same bed as a 13 year old boy, who is NOT your child, is just sick.

People even get angry when someone even mentions it, like we're supposed to forget those "dark times". I haven't seen any news venue reach out to the victims or the family of the victims to gain their reaction. Why are we not allowed to mention these things? Why are these topics closed for discussion? My own mother became angry with me saying it was disrespectful to the dead. I hadn't realized that the dead demanded so much respect.

I am not a completely heartless person. When I heard of his passing, I was shocked but not surprised. You can only do so much to the human body before it gives out. And MJ was far from the epitome of health. I did feel sad for his children because despite how warped and bizarre the family dynamic can be, he was still the only father they had known. I felt sad for his family, again, as warped as they may be, they were a family. Death is a difficult thing to cope with and you cannot select who or what type of person will end up being in your family (even I have a few nutcases and jailbirds in the family tree). Even Jeffrey Dahmer's family mourned for him after his death.

Much to my surprise I have been able to openly and rationally discuss these things with a very select few people (actually, only 2 people). I had one person tell me that they felt really sorry for MJ. That he was abused as a child and he had been exploited his whole life and that is why he turned out to be a pederast. I'm sure you can visit any prison and ask a convicted pedophile about his childhood and you would hear some sob story of abuse and neglect. Does that make it acceptable? There are millions of people around the world who were victimized as children and grew up to not repeat the cycle of abuse. I know MJ was acquitted of the second round of charges but he bought his way out of the first and I have always wondered if the verdict would have been different if he wasn't rich and famous.

And while I mention his fame, there is another aspect of MJ that I have always found to be fascinating and incomprehensible. This is a very delicate subject and I may really offend some but I'll go there anyway because, hey, it's my blog. It's about race and I'll start with my own personal view:
I have expressed my disdain for Jessica Alba for not remaining true to her Latin roots. The blond hair, the fake blue contacts she wore in the Rise of the Silver Surfer movie, and the "I'm not really a Latina" comment. I also give the same flack to Jennifer Lopez and Shakira. Can't a Latina be famous and sexy without being blond? Latin women are not just white women with a tan and a big ass. We have a beautiful and unique look that I think should be valued on its own merit. JLo became a star based on her portrayal of Selena and Selena wasn't a blond. And I feel they are a bit of a disgrace to the race by not accentuating and celebrating the Latin look. So I wonder: why does the African American community hold MJ in such high regard when he had such an obvious hatred of his racial heritage? Can one honestly look at pictures of little Michael from the Jackson 5, and compare them to the Off The Wall, Thriller, and Bad album covers and think this is a man who is black and proud? He literally cut his nose off to spite his face. And his skin? I have known people with vitiligo. You're supposed to cover the white spots with makeup that is close to your own natural skin color, not cover up your dark skin color to match the white spots. I doubt that the Hispanic community would be so forgiving of JLo is she went so far as to bleach her skin, lipo her butt and engage in other procedures to make herself white. MJ was ashamed of being black, so why is he held as a hero to the black community? Surely there are other artists out there who have talent and fame and have stayed true to and celebrated their heritage and culture (Stevie Wonder, Queen Latifa, Lawrence Fishbourne, Tyler Perry)?

Michael Jackson was a very talented singer, dancer and overall performer. He was innovative and brought entertainment to millions. BUT his final few decades were filled with erratic and, dare I say it, criminal behavior. In my eyes, it has tarnished his persona in a way that not even death can erase. Now he is gone. I still admire the music and the dancing, the creative music videos and performances. However, he is no hero to me nor is he a God or King. He is a sad man who fell very far from grace and perhaps his vices led to his early demise. But he did it to himself and has no one but himself to blame. I feel pity for his children and family but I also feel pity for the children he abused, both known and unknown, and their families, who will never have their day in court and who will never receive an apology. I feel sorry for the fans, both current and former (myself in the latter category), who never received an apology from him for his actions and for the disappointment he caused to so many. Rest in peace Michael Jackson, as everyone you have left behind must find their own peace.